Wednesday, November 30, 2005

You Pee Ess!!

Today let me enlighten you on my occupation. For those of you that don't know me, I'm going to spell it out...sort of. The company I work for is huge and worldwide so I'm sure they have spies here in blogovania. So here's what I'ma gonna do...I'ma gonna create some code words for future reference here in 'my mind'.

You know how when you were little, people would say "if you drink too much tea, you pee tea" ? What?! You don't remember anyone in your family saying that?? What kind of family are you from? Anyway, let's pretend there's a drink called 'ess'. Yeah, like the nineteenth letter in our beloved alphabet...that ess. Now let's pretend you drank too much of the stuff, what would happen? You pee ess!! ....that's the name of the company I work for, so for the sake of our code-talking future let's call that code word #1.
Got it? Good!

Now on to code word #2. You'll see why it's called that, here in a minute. At #1 there's this color. It's everywhere! It's sickening! It's disgusting! It's the same color as the treasures you find in your yard if you have a dog. And yet 'they' decided to use it in the new slogan. Unbelievable. I'm sure you've heard it..."what can (#2) do for you?" Had they consulted us drivers, it never would have left the drawing board. Hideous.

One of my favorite things that happens all the time is when you walk into a business with a package and the person behind the counter says "Hey! Whatdya got there?" at which time I'll raise the box and turn to to every conceivable angle while eyeballing it and say "Looks like a box to me! Don't worry though, that funny ticking noise JUST quit!" What I feel like saying, though, is "how am I supposed to know? You ordered it you moron!"

And what's the big deal with the shorts? I mean really! Everybody and their dog has to comment on the shorts. "Oh you can sure tell summer's over, the (#1) guy doesn't have his shorts on!" or once there was this OLD guy (he had to be 95!!), he looked like George Burns, only worse. He walked up to me and with what seemed like the last three breaths he'd ever breathe, he says "Hey (#2) man where's the sexy shorts?" And, to my surprise, he still had three breaths left to laugh at his own joke. I just don't get it. Are the shorts that special? Don't answer that.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Things I Hate...

...hate is such a strong word, but sometimes it just appropriate. Here's a non-exhaustive (although by the time I'm done you might be exhausted) list of some things I hate.

I hate...

...when my kids are in any sort of pain.
...hurting someone I love.
...being misunderstood.
...making the same mistake twice.
...how much of a fool I feel like when I do.
...when pain owns the heavy end of the scale.
...closing my eyes and seeing someone I love and knowing that may be the only way I'll ever see them again.
...opening my eyes after that.
...gravel pizza (I'll explain later)
...when a friend has a need and there's nothing I can do about it.
...the sound of the word 'lonely'.
...knowing I've wronged someone I love, but not knowing how.
...how many children die everyday.
...how many people I call friend will go to hell.
...that faith is seen as a weakness.
...tears that I'm a part of.
...vegemite.
...that I get to see so little of my kids.
...that it can't be 80 degrees year-round.
...that love is so complex and elusive.


That's a good start. Let me hear some of your 'hates'!

Monday, November 28, 2005

The Nature of Things

This weekend I travelled down to Southern California sort of on a whim. But not really. I'd been thinking about how to do it when, there was a slight opening in the window of opportunity, so I jumped through. And I am SO glad I did!

From start to finish I (and my brother, at times) logged 2700-ish miles down and back the left coast in a total of 45 actual driving hours. That may seem crazy, but we feel like we dawdled. In my opinion, it's some of the most beautiful scenery in the world. There are the snow capped Cascades, the Siskiyous in Oregon and Northern California and...okay so Central California doesn't even deserve the word 'boring', but then there's that Southern California. When you slide down the south side of the Grapevine and the sun is beaming through the palm trees....aaahhhh!!I grew up...okay....I got taller (since I'm still refusing to grow up) down there and I must admit, I LOVE it!

While I love beautiful scenery and the sunshine and palm trees and the beaches and the grandeur of the the rocky cragged mountains, those were not the favorite part of my trip. My favorite moments happened when I noticed the nature of God in the people he's blessed me with. Sharing coffee with my brother and his girlfriend. Watching movies, listening to loud laughter, talking about nothing in particular, seeing true joy in the eyes of my friend, having my cheeks hurt from smiling at her daughter, that's the nature I enjoyed this weekend.

It was hard to leave. Harder than walking away from the Grand Canyon, or the ocean's edge, because I was in the presence of real beauty. Thank you my friends for letting me enjoy you.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

So, how do you do this? I'm a rookie at this and have never liked being a rookie at anything so you'll have to excuse my shaky start. Well, you don't have to, but I would like it if you did.

I've been perusing through blogdom for a few months now and am impressed with how many clever, creative, smart people there are. I'm here to make sure that the not-so-clever, not-as-creative, less-than-brilliant of us in the populace have a say. But I'm not really sure yet what it is I want to say. Sometimes my mind is just full of small inspirations and sometimes it's full of...goo! I'm not afraid to share either. Of what edification will this be? I don't know. I believe the impact of an action or a word can't be measured by the doer of the act or the speaker of the word, but only by the receiver. Let me explain. Let's say I have a friend named Joe. Every time I stop to talk to Joe I give him a jab on the shoulder, (you know, the way guys do when they want the other guy to know there's some affection being shared here.)and he returns the favor. Now let's pretend it's been 6 months since I've seen Joe and we suddenly meet in the aisle at the grocery store and, of course, I give him the customary jab, only this time he shrieks in agony and knuckles to the ground in pain. I say to him "C'mon Joe, that didn't hurt!" only to find out in the ambulance on the way to the hospital that Joe is suffering from a debilitating form of bone cancer. The same blow I'd given him a hundred times in the past snapped a bone in his arm. Something had changed below the surface. Had I known his inner condition I wouldn't have hurt him. Sooo, (how did I end up down THIS trail? And what are all these rabbits doing here?) I guess what I'm saying is, things are always changing below the surface of our lives. Yours and mine. I'm going to let you in on some of mine.

"I just showed up for my own life, and I'm standing here taking it all in and it sure looks bright" ~Sara Groves